A Labor Union Does a Video Story On Me

The AFL-CIO, one of the largest unions in America, did a story on me.  Watch it here:

Best Mother's Day to date!

I am sooooooo happy to say that I was Blessed to celebrate Mother's Day this year with my daughter's! Not only With my daughters, but with them here in our home, in the USA, it's been 8 months since they've been in our home here, so it was the Best mommy's day to date! It's so different this year, compared to previous years where I looked forward to a day to celebrate being rewarded for my job as a mommy by getting a break from the everyday responsibilities that that requires, such as getting breakfast served to Me in bed, or just simply shopping alone, even if only for groceries. This year I, who j I previously thought of as a day about me, I now recognize it as a day to give special appreciation for the very fact that I Am a mommy, and to be grateful that I'm able to have my beautiful daughters to take grocery shopping (which was the biggest event of the day this year). It's funny, the things that I used to take for granted or find a chore or tiresome are now the very things I am so grateful to be doing, and I am grateful for this new found perspective and pray I never lose it!
   Years ago I went to Africa for a couple weeks to minister to those in need, and when I returned home to my apartment my roommate had just moved out and taken with her all our dish towels, something that may sound so trivial, at the time was somewhat irritating and very inconvenient, but I mention it because it taught me a very valuable lesson that has stayed with me, to never lose perpective of what I'd taken for granted. At that time it was dish towels, when i'd just spent weeks with families  who didn't own a single dish towel, let alone more than a single pot to cook on an open fire for their entire family. Maybe the lesson I thought I'd learned, and have never forgot I haven't yet applied in all things, because I now see so clearly  that I am reliving the same lesson as blessings.

Seeing the Invisible

It's time for an update... but, I've been wondering what to share because things feel at a stall. I haven't yet seen the results I'd hoped from the contacts I made, and momentum I'm still trying to build - not just with Senator Murray's office and We Are One America, -but with others I've contacted in my sphere to help as well.  Many people expressed willingness, to help but it feels a bit like the train is slowing down, and I'm not sure what I should be doing to get it moving again. I'm continuing to trust and not be discouraged but I find myself feeling like a child, impatiently waiting because time seems agonizingly the hardest obstacle. I'm starting to wonder if I put too much faith in what people say. How many times is it ok to ask or reach out before risking alienation. I worry that if I keep reaching out to ask for help that I might alienate or turn people off to the ultimate goal. At the same time, what does it really matter if I'm ignored or rejected? My faith can't be in people, we are all fallible - my faith is in God, I can trust Him, and this is too important to quit.
This morning I was encouraged when I read " So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (MSG)

Outside of all that, I can hardly express my anticipation for what is to come. My daughters will be here soon, which excites me to tears. I cannot wait to wake up in the morning to their faces and get to enjoy my time off in their company! The fact that our youngest daughter, Catalina, has been living away from me almost as long as she lived with me breaks my heart, and I am beyond words excited to get to know her and see her daily! Today I resorted to speaking in Spanish with Maya, our 6 year old, which is something I've avoided, just so she could have a conversation with me on the phone. In these past 8 months she's become so immersed in her Mexican culture (a fact I can't regret or resent) that it's difficult for her to communicate in English. We will soon get to read together again, and just be together! I've so missed her company. I bet she can help me improve my Spanish as I help her remember her English.

.... Oh the things we take for granted....

I am trying to figure out my work schedule so that I'm able to work enough to provide for our needs, but also spend time with my children while they are here. I am so very fortunate that my mother-in-law will be here to care for them. Although, she has a son with 3 other grandchildren also living here so I can't have her all to myself, my brother in law and his family need her too. Fine... I say with a pout not at all begrudgingly, hehe. ;)

The beds are made, there is some drawer & closet space available... I am nearly ready. I need to clear out some things, but I think the plan to hold a garage sale before the kids arrive might be too ambitious, and need to be tossed, considering work & weather. We don't need to walk through the garage anyway right?! And there is still space in the attic to shove stuff.

So the preparations continue, and excitement builds for both the known and unknown. I can't wait for my children to be here, and I continue to pray for a more permanent resolution, to bring my whole family back together.

NPR Inspires New Blogger

Before getting to the point, I really have to share about a weakness I came across today. 

I started the day with online banking (big mistake). Even though we have been blessed by other's generosity and God's provision, I had an near melt down moment this afternoon before going to the bank to pay the mortgage. Rafael has always taken care of our finances, and for good reason.

For all my single years I managed for myself well. Until now... Rafael has provided for us and never made me feel inadequate in my part of the responsibilities, but now with the roles reversed.... It's so foreign, and today frustrating! I don't want to be in charge of our financial stability! I know it's just as foreign to him, he'd much rather be working his butt off to provide for us all, but today I wanted just a moment of weakness to give in to fear and freak out, even when I know, in all of this, God is faithful and in control & seriously providing. 

NPR is now fixed on my radio, thanks to my cousin, brother & best friend who've all shared with me something they've heard there that relates to my family's current circumstances. After coming home from another late night of work, I sat fixated in my driveway listening to a Nigerian author speaking about her story & how different we would see others if we only knew their story rather than assuming because of where they come from or their appearance. It was not only thought provoking, but admittedly somewhat convicting. Next up was Pixar writer, director & animator of some of my favorite films (fyi -he's working on Finding Nemo II -due out in 2015!) talking about how to tell a story. This is where I found myself lacking and almost apologetic in my abilities to convey this emotional journey I'm on, and taking mental notes of how to be more effective. THEN the program changed to, ironically, a Latino show talking with blogger moms of mixed families!

  The point of all this is that if I wasn't having to live with this, at times seemingly unbearable, separation of my husband and children, I would never have learned and grown as much as I continually am. I am truly grateful for what I've gained - a broader perspective, a greater understanding and a better self. And hopefully, coming soon, also a cliffhanging story teller.

 

Labor Unions get involved in our Immigration Case

 

Over the weekend I was filmed & interviewed by the WSLC (Washington State Labor Council) who is assisting the AFLCIO (The American Federation of Labor and Congress of Industrial Organizations) on a documentary about the need for immigration reform. The woman Kathy, who came to our house was very happy with how it went, and said she would contact reporters & her colleagues at Senator Murray's office on our behalf, share the film with them, and that people need to see our story. Being on camera is beginning to feel more comfortable, I'm sure in part because I was made to feel that "we are just having a conversation" and I'm able to ignore the spotlight in my face and microphone attached to me. At one point in the "conversation" I could see Kathy was also tearing up as I shared our family's story & struggle.  In all I was very encouraged by her concern and action.

I requested a meeting with Senator Patty Murray, again, and this time was told they will hang on to my request because "There are still many pieces in motion". This week the Seattle Times quoted Senator Murray saying "she had never seen this level and intensity of support for an individual" regarding Orcas Island citizen Ben Nunez-Marquez, who is scheduled to be deported this month, & "she has written to the Dept. of Homeland Security head (Jeh Johnson) asking for his help". Those pieces haven't yet come together to accomplish my family's return, but I press on knowing it will work together for good!

 

On the home front.....with 7+ months behind us and no forseeable end in sight (yet) Rafael, the girls & I have been Skyping more frequently. They woke me up at 6:15am, which is really early for me, but a wonderful way to start the day. That afternoon I was able to join them (via Skype) for dinner. Rafael said how nice it was to have dinner as a family. I agree, it really felt like I was involved until he stepped away to wash the dishes,  (one of the perks for me is no dishes) Catalina started dumping out her cup of water onto her tray, she just stared at me when I corrected her and continued playing with her water, suggesting "hehe what are you going to do? head-in-a-box mommy with no arms". While I'm not able to effectively discipline my daughters, it was a lot of fun playing peek-a-boo & singing with them before bedtime.

Maya has two weeks off of school so Rafael is taking the kids to the rural ranch house where they can get dirty playing and "rough it". I am so grateful they get to experience that life and extremely proud of my wonderful husband!

 

Northwest Detention Center Rally

  
  Saturday morning I was at the Northwest Detention Center in Tacoma, where a gathering was taking place. For those of you who don't know, that is people are imprisoned while awaiting deportation. Rafael was held there one week, but most detainees are there for weeks, months, even years. There was going to be a demonstration with speakers educating the public of the living conditions within those walls, and people sharing their stories. I went to volunteer, and show my support for other families facing the same devastation as ours.

  As I helped set up I saw family after family going inside to visit those detained loved ones. A mother carrying an infant, walking her toddler.  A father with three grown daughters all dressed in their Sunday best. As another family passed by.... parents with four children, the children skipped by me and raced each other to the car (they looked like they could be returning from a family outing to Home Depot, and reminded me of my own childhood with my siblings, yet they have this heart wrenching separation that I didn't have in my own childhood. Such different family memories being shaped.

  To create a banner, we continually unrolled butcher paper as we glued photo after photo of families broken by the current immigration laws. I'm so glad I was there, for those hours I had before going to work, but it was heartbreaking and difficult to hide my tears under the hat I wore meant to keep out the cold & rain.

I felt depressed and encouraged at the same time seeing so many others affected & the efforts of so many strangers working bringing awareness and support! As usual this journey has been one of mixed feelings. I continue to pray, believe for, and work toward and ending that is more sweet and less bitter.

I Was On Univision Seattle

I was on Univision Seattle yesterday.

Although they posted the numbers to my Senator - I wasn't given a chance to tell the people to please call these senators and ask them to have a meeting with me.

Their numbers are

Senator Patty Murray's DC Line: Phone: (202) 224-2621

Senator Maria Cantwell (202) 224-3441

God bless and thank you.

Special Visitors

Thanks be to God! Good news! My mother in law (God bless her) is going to bring my babies home and stay here to take care of them for a couple of months!!!!! This means, not ONLY do I get to see my children everyday, but that they will be cared for in our home, by their grandma!!! I am SOOOOO excited I could scream! and am in tears of "joy" as I tell Maya, "happy tears".
 Now if I could just get my loving, adorable husband here!...... but everything in due time....

I (with much help) bought them one way tickets, because who knows what will happen in the next few months so lets not over plan. They arrive May 10th! What a wonderful Mother's Day I will have!

Pulling Maya out of kindergarten 6 weeks early, requires some home-schooling for her here in the USA, but I'm very excited to tag team with my mother n law to develop her education in both Spanish and English! I've always wanted to homeschool my children, because I so appreciated my homeschooled education, but never, until now, felt I was motivated or disciplined enough to do so.
I seriously have never been so motivated to make every moment with my children count as now! Not just in their "education" but in their development as a people & women.. I am so grateful, for this time which I have never recognized before as a parent, and I thank God for that recognition.

I was dreaming the other night and half awoke, completely expecting Rafael to be there. You all know how that is, when you wake up from a dream and feel the overwhelming disappointment of reality. I haven't experienced that since my mother and sister passed away. I just wanted to go back to sleep... for the rest of the day and stay in my happy place. Unfortunately that accomplishes no positive results. BLAH!

This week's been especially difficult- I was at a friends gathering where a guest was there with her 18mo old daughter, and I could only think of Catalina, who in less than a month, will be the same age, and I just wanted to squeeze that baby thinking of my own. Each family that has come into the restaurant I work at this week (and there have been many) with their young children, I can only picture my own family and the times and meals we are missing together....

Yesterday I was finally able to Skype with my family and it was really nice to see that Catalina now recognizes mommy on the screen and trying to engage with me, trying to give me kisses and actually "talking" to me. It's bittersweet to be able to see & talk to them, I LOVE  seeing their sweet faces and hearing their voices, but Oh it's heart wrenching every time to see what I'm missing and to have to say goodbye.

Coming up, I'm meeting with Senator Maria Cantwell's office and have an in studio interview with Univision Seattle....let's hope the meeting with Cantwell's office will give me good things to say about her in my t.v. interview. Our Senators have power and influence, my prayer is that they use it for good!

Meeting with Senator Patty Murray

I'm excited! I just returned from a meeting with Patty Murray's representative regarding our family's case. My continual thanks to all of you advocating to Senators Murray & Cantwell on our behalf! My hope is that our Senators and Congress persons recognize that our circumstances impact so many others, and they are also willing to use their influence to advocate on our behalf with DHS Secretary Jeh Johnson & Attorney General Eric Holder. I can't say I left the meeting encouraged, but I recognize that it is a step in the process. 

 

I was told, "we are willing to assist you within the process available by law" -excellent because I am not asking for anything outside of the law, I am however requesting help in obtaining a parole visa available from the DHS Secretary Jeh Johnson & Attorney General Eric Holder. So I hope my Senators will recognize their ability to request with me on my behalf and be willing to do just that. It would be so much simpler if I knew personally any of these persons. Do any of you readers?

 

It's been nearly 7 months now that I've been without my family. I am in a daily battle to remain strong, trying not to give in to mourning and sorrow, knowing Rafael and our daughters are surrounded by family and loving support helps. I also know that all thing will work together for good, that I have to wait, for God's perfect plan to be accomplished. The waiting is the hardest, but it is also developing character in me. Longsuffering wouldn't have been my choice, but I'm definitely growing there.

Mixed emotions

I've been here with my family a little over a week now and I don't quite know how to express these mixed emotions.... being here together is like a dream, and real life is this nightmare of a situation we are in. I believe that the nightmare is temporary, but for this trip I feel the dread of knowing at some point I'm going to wake up, and be home again and separated from those I love the most.
     I'm actually mad, that Maya has forgotten so much English - she's continually asking "Papi como se dice ___ en ingles?" and "when can we go back to our yellow house in Washington" she doesn't always understand me or say things correctly in English... but at the same time I'm grateful for her Spanish education and smooth integration. I'm jealous that I'm missing so much of Catalina's development, it feels like I don't even know her, not the way a mother should. I can't put into words how it feels to have to ask Rafael things I should know, like how much milk does she drink, or is she ready for her nap? Yet I am so thankful that he is able to be a present parent, it is incredible to see the relationship the girls have with him & how loving and caring he is with our daughters.
      Every feeling I have is so mixed.  It's very difficult to be the mommy I need to be, faithful in schedule and discipline, when my days with them are numbered. It's hard to talk about serious things with my husband when it feels like we should make the most of our short time together. I just miss the family that we built, that can now only function together during these visits. I want nothing more than to have my girls grow up in the two parent household we built, and the forced distance between us is harder than I can put into words.
     It gets harder each time I have to leave my family again, but at the same time it has doubled my resolve! When I get back to what used to be home, I bring with me renewed strength and determination to continue doing whatever is necessary in this fight to get my family back.

Arrived in Zacatecas!

   I've arrived safely in Zacatecas, exhausted & elated at the same time. Such an amazing feeling to be able to hold my children tightly and the security of being in Rafael's arms! It makes 4 airports & 15 hours of traveling throughout the night worthwhile.

I was able to catch up on some much needed rest while the girls were napping, then we got the party started. We took Maya to pick out her pinata, she helped me bake & decorate her cake, and daddy took her for a date while I wrapped presents. A big Thank You to our friends and family who sent gifts for her! It was a very special connection to home and those she misses. 
   When all of Rafael´s siblings arrived with their spouses and children we had a full house! Can you believe it, 12 cousins (under the age of 11yrs old) and no fighting! It was especially fun to watch Maya ¨holding court¨ over her cousins who complied as she turn them into cats, dogs, mommy´s or daddy´s with a wave of her magic scepter. 
   To be surrounded by so much love & family was emotionally overwhelming for me, but made the day perfect.   

  

   

Birthday Boxing

This time last year I was hand making party decorations, cooking up edible starfish & seashells, and readying everything in preparation for Maya's "Under the Sea" 5th birthday. Fast forward a year, (it's crazy how things change) tonight I'm boxing up her favorite toys, gifts from friends and a variety of "comforts" from home, like Peanut butter and Real Cheerios, to bring my daughter for her 6th birthday. In less than 48 hours I'll be in route to visit my family!!!! Soooooo excited to see them and be able to hold them! That is the best gift I could ask for, but I'm pretty sure Maya's going to be super excited to open up her giant birthday box!

Department of Homeland Security Rips Away Children and Husband From American Mother

Dear readers,

I would like you to watch how the largest Spanish television network aired my story of how the Department of Homeland Security has ripped apart my family.

Please pass this story on to your friend and family.  Please email your State Senator to help me get an appointment to see Jeh Johnson, the Secretary of Homeland Security and Eric Holder, the U.S. Attorney General.  Senator list is here: Contact Your U.S. Senator

Special thanks to Michael FX of New Zealand for adding the subtitles and Jerry in Washington State for translating the clip.